The love Journey.... Battling with Unforgiveness

 "And hope maketh not ashamed; because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost which is given unto us"Romans 5:5

I always use to struggle with forgiving people who have wronged me or continue to love them despite what they did to me. I just felt like it was so unreal for a person to forgive someone who caused them pain and hurt. I mean let us be real, how do you forgive someone who murdered your loved ones or someone who raped you or molested you, how do you get to a point where you say I have completely forgiven you. For me that was just to good to be true and for God to require us to forgive, such was just too much to ask. Yes! I did think like that and most people around us think like that and hence we have a lot of broken people in the world.

You see unforgiveness can give birth to all sorts of evil in our hearts, because by holding on to hurt we give the enemy a way to creep in and he begins to influence evil thoughts concerning the lives of people whom we are failing to forgive. Because sometimes when we try to forgive certain people they keep repeating the same thing, so I got to a point where I was bitter and angry and I started plotting all sorts of evil things in my heart and just not hoping for good in that particular person's life.

The most scary thing was, unforgiveness became a burden to me because every time I would see that person my happiness will suddenly disappear, there would be some form of heaviness in my heart that I can't even explain. It would be as if my chest has been hit by a car and it was so uncomfortable. This burden was stopping me from doing everything, I didn't enjoy my self in the presence of God, I didn't enjoy prayer, I felt condemned. My relationship with God was just suffering and I was the one in bondage.

 Unforgiveness, hate, envy and all these things are like poison and they slowly destroy us, they steal joy from us and stop us from walking in freedom because the enemy makes us think that it is better for us to hold on to what the other person did to us because they were WRONG, but you know God in his word teaches us to forgive over and over again because he himself forgave us our trespass and out of a place of love gave his son  Christ Jesus to die in our place. In the scripture above Paul talks about the God  kind of love that has been shared abroad in our hearts, we have the love of God in our Spirit, we can forgive and love like God. The first time I read that scripture with understanding something in me jumped, In my previous post I mentioned that the word of God has power, it has life  in it and whenever it is spoken life is transferred into situations. It was as if a veil had been removed and I could clearly see the truth that has now led to my freedom.

 So I began meditating and confessing the scripture, " I have the God kind of love in me, I walk in love, I move in love, I operate in love, I associate in love and I respond in love". And the love of God began to take over my life I first got to fully understand the love of God FOR me and through that I began to walk in freedom, I would see the person and my heart would just love them. I continued confessing the scriptures daily and change was taking place, until I got to a place where I fully understood that love is not shaken by circumstances, when we love we love, the person's behavior or attitude does NOT determine how we love them.

1 Corinthians 13:8 says that love NEVER fails. It is the most powerful force on earth. It is the most powerful weapon that we can use to win souls into the kingdom of God. I am free now in Jesus name! Love rules in my life, everything that I do I do through the inspiration of the love of God. HALLELUJAH! GLORY BE TO GOD, who first loved us and in the same way we LOVE others, because we are made in his image and likeness. As he is, so are we.

 As a result of unforgiveness, the following became a reality in my life:

1. Unforgiveness stops us from walking in the fullness of what God called us to do.
When I was dealing with this issue of unforgiveness in my life I began to realize that it was stopping me from walking in the fullness of what God called me to because I would restrict my self  to certain things because I didn't want to get hurt. For example if you you grew up in an environment where your father was always beating your mother, marriage would become an ugly thing to you, that is why most young women don't want to get married because they think marriage is like that. But these are lies from the enemy, marriage is of God and hence meant to be enjoyed.

2. Unforgiveness hinders us from enjoying ourselves in the presence of God.
 You know I would always struggle to worship or to fully delve in the presence of God because there would be a constant reminder in my mind of unforgiveness. But I thank God for his word transformed my mind and now I walk in love.

3. Unforgiveness hinders us from walking in the freedom that we have in Christ Jesus.
Christ Jesus has set us free from every bondage in this world by dying for us on the cross. We are free, for whom the son of man sets free is free indeed. Holding grudges against people not only makes us bitter but it is also not good for our health. That just shows how dangerous unforgiveness is.

Now I thank the almighty God, my father, my king infact my all for giving me the grace to understand and receive his love for me, but most of all the grace to love others as he loved me.


With Love
Lunghile